Hello everyone

[LarkSparrow]

So proud of you. I know that couldn’t have been easy. We’re still here for you to navigate these emotions. You did what was best for you even though it was difficult to have the talk. One day at a time is how you move on from here.

Yes! We are here for you, Em. You may continue to have feelings to sort through, and this is a good place to come to share and get support.

[Em90]

Thank you everyone for all your kind words. I have to admit it’s been more difficult than I expected.

[Brigit]

Way to go.

You can always write here when the difficult times hit. We understand.

[Em90]

Way to go.

You can always write here when the difficult times hit. We understand.

Thank you.
 
I thought I would be so relieved when it was over but it’s harder than I thought it would be. We agreed not to communicate for a few weeks to let things settle. I’m glad that I don’t have to be sneaking around anymore and to be able to focus on my own family again but I am finding the no communicating difficult.

[Brigit]

Thank you.
 
I thought I would be so relieved when it was over but it’s harder than I thought it would be. We agreed not to communicate for a few weeks to let things settle. I’m glad that I don’t have to be sneaking around anymore and to be able to focus on my own family again but I am finding the no communicating difficult.

It may take quite a long time (perhaps months) for the chemicals to settle, so be ready for that. 

The cliche about keeping busy is true. Of course the thoughts will come crashing down on you occasionally and at those times, if you can, sit with them for a while but then pick yourself up and carry on.

I cried in the airplane bathroom yesterday and that made me feel a lot better. I’ve been fine since. I don’t recommend airplane bathrooms but some privacy where you can let it out is good!

Big hugs to you.

[Em90]

It may take quite a long time (perhaps months) for the chemicals to settle, so be ready for that. 

The cliche about keeping busy is true. Of course the thoughts will come crashing down on you occasionally and at those times, if you can, sit with them for a while but then pick yourself up and carry on.

I cried in the airplane bathroom yesterday and that made me feel a lot better. I’ve been fine since. I don’t recommend airplane bathrooms but some privacy where you can let it out is good!

Big hugs to you.

Thank you. Its good to know I’m not the only one feeling this way.
I have been resisting the urge to send him a message just to see how they both are.
I really don’t want to be away from my niece for months while things settle and sooner or later I am going to have to see him again which I’m dreading.

[Violet]

Good idea to not communicate while you let things settle down. But I certainly understand how hard it is to do so. You now have a void left where he was. It’s not easy. But you’ve got this. And so you know, many on here have tried to end things only to go back, then end it again. So, be prepared that if that happens it’s normal and we here understand that, too. The thing is with an EMR the OP is filling a need. Regardless of what society would judge, it is still the case nonetheless. And now it hurts when you lose the person who was fulfilling those needs. Period. One day at a time.

[Sunshinechica]

Em have you thought about a grief support group? 

You've lost your sister, and now the person that you had to support in your grief can't be there. 

It will be harder to not have contact given he is family.
But he can't be the support for you and you for him. 

Try to find another way, support group, therapy.

[Brigit]

Em have you thought about a grief support group? 

You've lost your sister, and now the person that you had to support in your grief can't be there. 

It will be harder to not have contact given he is family.
But he can't be the support for you and you for him. 

Try to find another way, support group, therapy.

This is a really good point, I agree with Sunshinechica.