Intro

[Jeudeballe]

Hi eveyone,

I met someone 7 years ago and there was instant mutual attraction. I fell for him gradually as i got to know him. We have a lot in common but are also opposites in some ways. We are both married, and nothing physical happened for 6 years. Last year, one thing led to another and we have grown closer. Neither of us wants to leave our families. We both love our spouses. So far we’ve tried to break off physical contact once, at my initiation, but it was short lived. We see each other only 4-5 times a year but are in touch every few days. 

I want to end it but have never felt this way before. He is a lid to my pot in so many ways. Just hoping the feelings will go away, but in the 6 years of resisting and minimizing contact, pretty much nothing changed, and of course the pull is stronger now that we grown closer. 

Thanks for creating this community.

[AbbieP71]

Hi eveyone,

I met someone 7 years ago and there was instant mutual attraction. I fell for him gradually as i got to know him. We have a lot in common but are also opposites in some ways. We are both married, and nothing physical happened for 6 years. Last year, one thing led to another and we have grown closer. Neither of us wants to leave our families. We both love our spouses. So far we’ve tried to break off physical contact once, at my initiation, but it was short lived. We see each other only 4-5 times a year but are in touch every few days. 

I want to end it but have never felt this way before. He is a lid to my pot in so many ways. Just hoping the feelings will go away, but in the 6 years of resisting and minimizing contact, pretty much nothing changed, and of course the pull is stronger now that we grown closer. 

Thanks for creating this community.

Welcome to TS! It's a great place for support! 

May I ask...are you guys long distance? Does he feel the same about wanting to end it?

[Harlow]

Hi and As a francophone, I adore your username.

[Jeudeballe]

Thank you both for the warm welcome!

Yes, we are long distance and he says he wants to do what i want to do, but doesn’t act like it—checks on me, shares his work problems, flirts with me… we will see each other in 5-6 weeks.

[Jeudeballe]

Hi and As a francophone, I adore your username.

My French is atrocious but I do love it.

[AbbieP71]

Thank you both for the warm welcome!

Yes, we are long distance and he says he wants to do what i want to do, but doesn’t act like it—checks on me, shares his work problems, flirts with me… we will see each other in 5-6 weeks.

And you want to end it because? Are you worried about being found out? Or?

[Jeudeballe]

And you want to end it because? Are you worried about being found out? Or?

Worried, yes, and feel very guilty. The last thing I want is for anyone to get hurt, on his or my side. We both have little kids and spouses who are great people. I have yet to come across a similar story… it seems that usually people are unhappy. I just feel like I can’t explain why I fell for him so hard, but I did.

[JustHer]

Worried, yes, and feel very guilty. The last thing I want is for anyone to get hurt, on his or my side. We both have little kids and spouses who are great people. I have yet to come across a similar story… it seems that usually people are unhappy. I just feel like I can’t explain why I fell for him so hard, but I did.

My situation is/ was very similar both M, no plans to leave, kids etc…. Good BS’s. From the outside all looked good. 

Enjoy yourself have fun stay safe, is my advice to you.   And protect your heart.

[Jeudeballe]

My situation is/ was very similar both M, no plans to leave, kids etc…. Good BS’s. From the outside all looked good. 

Enjoy yourself have fun stay safe, is my advice to you.   And protect your heart.

Wow, do you have a thread going? I believe I’m still in newbie poster purgatory since I can only access this and a couple of other newbie threads. 

Thank you for the good advice. Not sure how to protect my heart, though, rational thought is not my forte at the moment.

[AbbieP71]

I think you should be able to access some of the other posts? It took me a bit to figure out how to use the forum. If you ever want to check out someone's posts you should be able to click on their name and it will take you to where you can find their posts. At least you should be able to. It's been awhile since I was new so I can't remember how long it took to be able to do some of the things. 

You can have a great life and yet still find someone that your heart loves.

[Jeudeballe]

I think you should be able to access some of the other posts? It took me a bit to figure out how to use the forum. If you ever want to check out someone's posts you should be able to click on their name and it will take you to where you can find their posts. At least you should be able to. It's been awhile since I was new so I can't remember how long it took to be able to do some of the things. 

You can have a great life and yet still find someone that your heart loves.

Thanks! 

When I click on a name, it gives me the message that I don’t have permission to access the page [for the following 4 reasons, etc.]. I’ll wait until tomorrow to investigate further. I do like this feature of the forum if it’s meant to keep out fly-by trolls.

[Lily]

Welcome, I hope you feel at home here.

[Jeudeballe]

Welcome, I hope you feel at home here

Thank you.

[AbbieP71]

Thanks! 

When I click on a name, it gives me the message that I don’t have permission to access the page [for the following 4 reasons, etc.]. I’ll wait until tomorrow to investigate further. I do like this feature of the forum if it’s meant to keep out fly-by trolls.

Ohh ok yea it may take alittle longer to be able to access that. Heck I've been here for a few years now I think and I still don't know how to do a lot of things 

[Sandrine]

Hi and As a francophone, I adore your username.

Moi aussi je suis francophone.   

Newbie here and years back I was on a different kind of forum (not about EMRs) with the same type of platform, and I still find it confusing to navigate.

I hope to find some support here.  I'm an older (but well preserved!)  MOW who's been in an EMR with same aged (and well preserved!) MM.   We both have adult kids.   It's long distance EMR like the original poster, and we don't see one another much at all.  But this began 5 years ago and I am so confused that I could still be connected to this man, although technically I broke it off and tried (and failed) to cut the relationship a couple of times before.  It seemed to only intensify during the pandemic.  Victorian style longing?
Anyway I am here and hope to support other people in similar positions.  xo

[Harlow]

Moi aussi je suis francophone.   

Newbie here and years back I was on a different kind of forum (not about EMRs) with the same type of platform, and I still find it confusing to navigate.

I hope to find some support here.  I'm an older (but well preserved!)  MOW who's been in an EMR with same aged (and well preserved!) MM.   We both have adult kids.   It's long distance EMR like the original poster, and we don't see one another much at all.  But this began 5 years ago and I am so confused that I could still be connected to this man, although technically I broke it off and tried (and failed) to cut the relationship a couple of times before.  It seemed to only intensify during the pandemic.  Victorian style longing?
Anyway I am here and hope to support other people in similar positions.  xo

I don’t think it’s Victorian at all, I think the need for love and attraction has been an eternal longing. Bienvenue sur TS, you will get lots of support ici.

[Sandrine]

I don’t think it’s Victorian at all, I think the need for love and attraction has been an eternal longing. Bienvenue sur TS, you will get lots of support ici.

Merci beaucoup Harlow.  ça vachement pese!  I'm happy to have found this place where I can speak freely with mural understanding.

[Harlow]

Merci beaucoup Harlow.  ça vachement pese!  I'm happy to have found this place where I can speak freely with mural understanding.

Yes, you’ve found a place of mutual understanding and we are so glad that you’re here. Keep posting and we will keep supporting!